If you’re struggling with anything – be it weight, alcohol, diet, habits, or relationships – know and trust there’s a way through whatever the problem seems to be. I say it can be distilled down to three basic principles.
- ALWAYS AN OUT – Never think there’s no way out. It may take time and patience. Remember that patience is NOT waiting – it’s KNOWING. You know that next month is coming, so you don’t become impatient about the date itself. We need to be of this mindset when it comes to believing things are always and currently okay. We’re always right where we need to be, even if it hurts. Keep showing up for the positive things like moving your body, eating healing foods, and surround yourself with positive people/input (such as inspiring books). Trust in the process, and you’ll start turning around. Things will progressively get lighter and lighter.
- WANT IT – Whatever’s the problem, you’ll get out of it if you want it bad enough. We’re always doing whatever we really want to be doing. Even if our bad habits make us feel like we’re under their control – like we’re their helpless puppet – we need to be sick enough of feeling the way we currently do to want to change. If you’re not able to change, forgive yourself. Then, ask yourself, “why am I not in enough pain to want to change myself?” The answer may be elusive but if you keep this in your head and remain vigilant, the reasons will reveal themselves with time and experience.
- REMEMBER – Never lose sight of where you were and where you are now. If you’re in the throes of struggling, this means you must think back to a time when you were happier – perhaps childhood. What were the things that inspired you? Hit the reset button and start returning to this headspace. It may be counter-intuitive as an adult, but it will ultimately deliver you unto your purpose. If you’re on the other end of your struggle, then never stop growing. If we’re not evolving, we’re devolving, and this can be subtle. Bad habits and thoughts are tenaciously sneaky in their ability to re-manifest as new habits mimicking old thought patterns. For instance, if you are 3 years clean from substances, whatever escapism tendencies which catalyzed your substance misuse may reemerge as compulsive shopping. This usually happens when we slip on whatever devotions heal us. For me, I notice if there’s a major lapse in my meditation, running, or dietary practices, old habits come back and I tend to become depressed & anxious. Never let up on whatever brings you happiness and gives you purpose. When we fall down once we’ve caught a glimpse our better self, the internal dialogue can be twice as harsh
I’m not perfect. I slip often, and that’s the point; we always stay self-aware enough to notice these slips, forgive ourselves, and then move forward. I’m not saying I relapse; I’m saying I slip. I forget myself by falling out of alignment with my values via my actions. So, think about your values and conduct yourself in ways that honor them. When we don’t do what we intuitively know to be good and right, it creates tremendous internal noise and ultimately mental illness. Our thoughts profoundly affect the material world we inhabit. An example of an outward manifestation of this idea can be someone like a bodybuilder with a finely chiseled physique; their inner drive and their thoughts about who they want to be shaped their very body. I hope this provides at least one person with a little hope.
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